Last night I woke up at 3am to pee. I don't know if you ever experience this, but every now and again, I'll wake up in the middle of the night at just the right moment, and then will be wide awake for an hour or two. Annoying. What's worse is that at night I have a tendency to suffer from anxiety. Last night I started fretting that no one likes me and no one wants to be in a relationship with me. I know, I know, it's old news, but what do you want, that's what showed up.
I decided, after an hour of tossing and turning, to ... pray. To what, I don't know, because I find the whole god notion to be patently absurd. I guess it was a mixture of praying, meditating and creating my day. It was 4am, after all.
Ok, so... Dear God: ... Mmmh. No. I don't believe in god, really, not in the dear god way, that's just hypocritical. So. Dear Universe. ... What? Dear Universe? That's even more absurd. Oh I know, Dear Monkey God... huh? Ok, I'm not at all related to the monkey god, that's even more hypocritical.
Damn it, this is not so easy, is it?
Ok, here we go. Dear ... what? No, nevermind, no dear anything. How about, To The Universe. What? I'm not writing a memo, for heaven's sake.
Gah!
Ok. Here we go. Bring me peace, bring me the love I've been looking for. Bring me peace, bring me the love I've been looking for. Bring me peace, bring me the love I've been looking for.
Ok. Simple, easy to remember, I can do this.
Bring me peace, bring me the love I've been looking for. Bring me
peace, bring me the love I've been looking for. Bring me peace, bring
me the love I've been looking for.
Damn it, I have to pee AGAIN? I did not have that much water before going to bed.
Bring me peace, bring me the love I've been looking for. Bring me
peace, bring me the love I've been looking for. Bring me peace, bring
me the love I've been looking for.
Ok, this is working a bit, I am not as anxious. This is good.
Bring me -- wait a minute, who will bring it? Didn't I just go through this with the whole God, Monkey God, Universe thing? If I don't believe in an external power, than who am I asking? What if I'm one with the universe and I'm the one who has to cause the cosmic shift to get me where I need to be?
I am peace, I am the love that I'm looking for.
Finally, empowered and happy, I fell asleep.