Which would have been too much. Too much.
A few short weeks ago, you may remember, I called the cable company out to fix my cable box, which turned out to be -- wait for it -- off. And yes, I also ask myself how I've gotten so far in life. I think it's that I'm cute and I have excellent time management skills.
A little more recently, I bundled my cable, internet and phone, so Time Warner came out again and fiddled around with the phone lines. About a week ago I noticed one of my phones was not working. Sigh. I haven't called TW out again out of sheer absent-mindedness. I mean, damn it, they switched me over to their fancy digital phone thingy, I need it to work!
This evening I accidentally (coincidentally?) noticed that there was a loose phone jack lying around. I followed it, and behold! The cord went straight into the phone that was not working. In a fit of pure genius, I pulled the cord out of the phone, and attached the phone to the phone cord that was plugged into the wall.
Voila. The phone works. So, it turns out that if you don't hook up the phone to the phone plug using a phone cord, the phone doesn't work. I mean, can you believe that shit?
Yeah.
Short story made long, I was spared further unnecessary embarrassment. Though admittedly that would have made a better follow-up post. Apparently, you can't have everything.

